Bobbi Sizemore, C.Ht.
I believe we all have things that we can do better than anyone else, our very own superpowers! It may not be on the scale of ending world hunger, of course, but we each have unique gifts and talents. That’s why we’re here! To be an example to someone, to extend a hand or make a positive impact on another’s life. I’m afraid many people don’t believe this to be true for them. A few examples of what can prevent people from tapping into their gifts can be summed up in a few ways.
Thoughts That Hold You Back
- Old programming. When we are born, we come into this world with two fears: loud noises and the fear of falling. Everything else is learned. Because we are infants and young children, our experiences are limited so we look to those around us to learn about life and the world. Our parents, teachers, siblings, relatives, clergy, anyone we observe on a regular basis. You have heard the saying “children don’t do what you say, they do what you do” and it’s true. It’s called modeling. Infants and children model the emotions, behaviors and world view of those around them.
- Low self-esteem. If you are raised in a fear based or negative atmosphere, if you’re told or treated like you aren’t good enough that registers. Experienced enough times you can become certain those opinions, manipulations or mistreatment from authority figures must be true even though they’re not.
- Fear of what other people think. This is simply a byproduct of low self esteem and old programming. We strive to avoid pain, it’s natural. When your thought processes lead you to believe that you aren’t good enough and, if you try, people will laugh, mock or judge you; it’s a challenge to take a chance. Everyone likes to be accepted. You subconsciously make a choice that the pain of regret is better than the pain of any perceived ridicule. But is it?
If really think about it, what is the thing, or things, that you think you would be good at? What is it that you would love to try but just haven’t yet? Why haven’t you given it a go yet?
I can’t hear your answer, but I’ve asked this question of so many people and most have had these answers in common.
Top 10 Excuses
I don’t have the time.
I’ve tried getting healthy before and it didn’t work.
I don’t have the money.
I don’t have the right education or credentials.
Who would listen to me?
What if it doesn’t work out? That would be embarrassing.
My family needs me to … fill in the blanks,
People on Facebook and Instagram and they’re already doing it.
What do all these statements have in common? They are EXCUSES not REASONS.
When I say that to someone, the reply often goes something like “Yeah but…” “You don’t understand…” “No, my situation is different.” Among other things. More excuses.
There are so many stories of repeated failures, ridicule and doubt. Think about Henry Ford, Oprah Winfrey, They were all told they weren’t good enough, didn’t look the right way, lacked education or the money to do their thing; yet they all went for it anyway. It may not have been any overnight success in some cases, but success did come.
We live in the most exciting time ever! We have more knowledge and opportunity available at our fingertips than ever before. Money is not an obstacle, education is not an obstacle, time is not an obstacle. The internet is always open, the resources are unlimited! If you don’t have access to a computer or smart phone, find your closest library internet access is free there.
All you need is a purpose, a desire and a commitment to yourself. I’m not saying it’s easy. I’m not saying it’s not terrifying, I’m saying you can do it. I did.
When I was in high school, my mom kept telling me that college was not for me. “Learn to type and get married.” Was the life and career advice I was given. It’s not a reflection on my mom personally, she was sharing with me, based on her life experience and subconscious mapping, the advice that she thought was safest for me. She said this out of love.
What did I do? Learned to type and got married.
That was fine for a while, but ideas kept popping into my head. I thought that I may be helpful to more than just my family. I helped people in my community, taught Sunday school, helped at the animal shelter. Still, I felt I could and should do more. In my mind I was too young, not educated enough, not smart enough, I had a little boy so there was the time and money thing, and I was afraid to tell anyone what I wanted to do because I didn’t want them to tell me it was a stupid idea, and I was stupid for thinking it.
Fast forward about 10 years and I got my first computer! This new thing called the internet was opening all kinds of doors, you could learn so much and most of it was free!
Did I make any big changes in then? Nope. I read, I researched, I planned and dreamed, and I did not take any action. Old subconscious scripts are strong! So, what stopped me? Me.
Another 10 years go by and I’m a divorced single mom, so much for learning to type and get married! Time for Plan B, real estate. I did that for a long time but never loved it. I still had that wee small nagging that I should be doing something else, something that helps people, with my life.
Fast forward. In my 50s I headed back to school and became a college student! Was it terrifying? OMG, yes!! Honestly, it still is. But you know what else it is? It’s fun! Working for myself, I get to help people every day and I haven’t stopped learning yet.
I could let fear of stranger’s judgement stop me. Procrastination could be because imposter syndrome (fear) tells me that I need more training. I could do a ton of things instead of seeing clients, working and writing helpful and uplifting messages, but I’m doing it. It doesn’t matter if no reads this. It doesn’t matter if a ton of people read my blog and laugh at me.
This is my life. Opinions of others, especially strangers, has no effect.
There is so much great information out there, my wish for you is that you will follow your heart and your passions. If you’re struggling with writing a new life script, losing weight, getting in shape and quieting those old patterns that no longer serve you, reach out to me or another wellness specialist. OMG it’s so much fun to try new things, I can’t wait to see what you do!
xo Bobbi
